A Leopard Scarf & Thoughts From This Week
To say the events that occurred on January 6th left me feeling heartbroken, angry, and appalled would be a huge understatement. I process things internally, not externally, which is why I haven’t been vocal on social media the past couple of days. I know silence isn’t effective, but I needed to take some time to do a lot of internal reflection, to process and grasp all that occurred. It’s still difficult to know what to say. I’m worried I’ll say the “wrong” thing that it’s paralyzed me from taking action. I know this is my platform and I’m able to express myself freely, but I so desperately desire inclusion and belonging and the enneagram 9 (peacemaker) in me is terrified at the thought of offending anyone. I’ll be honest and admit that I still don’t really know what to say. All I can say is how I’m feeling and what I’ve been thinking.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Heaven, truthfully. Longing for the day where there will be no more pain or sorrow and the tragedies of this world will fade away. The 1 year anniversary of my Dad’s passing will be here in a couple of weeks and it’s been consuming my thoughts all month long. I keep thinking about how grateful I am that my Dad is fully healed and soaking up all the glory of Heaven. How he doesn’t have to deal with the hardships and struggles that he was already experiencing due to cancer, but also what’s been happening in our world since he passed away, like the pandemic, ongoing systemic racism, and now the domestic terrorism that took place at the Capitol.
When it feels like the world is crumbling down around me and all I seem to hear is bad news on every social media outlet, it makes me yearn for Jesus that much more. To draw nearer to Him through prayer and reading my Bible. He’s my source of hope when it feels like there isn’t any left. There’s a long road ahead of us and there’s a lot of work that we all need to be apart of in order for unity to happen within our country. Until I get to Heaven I’m going to put in the work and do my best to continue having difficult conversations, educating myself, loving others, and respecting those with different backgrounds from my own. Sending you all so much love, light, peace, and joy ❤️✨